I am Aehsaas, and this is my first article. So why was I captivated by dramas? Because it was something different from what I was watching since childhood ~ The culture, story, portrayal were all poles apart from Bollywood, the only cinema I knew growing up.
But there was one similarity: "parenthood". The society we live in allows us to communicate, but there's a limitation according to topics. Not everything can be touched by words because humans have hyped them to the extent that we can't talk about it further rather than the fixed definitions. Parenthood is one of them. Ideally, it's a stage in Humans' life when they have to act as a guide to a newborn. God made this interesting by adding the concept of blood relations between them so humans don't think of it as a burden but their own blood or own creation bearing the scent of life forward. But let's again focus on its definition - it's a stage of human life, not a total change of human mindset from what it was before. Unlike other people, a parent is no different ~ struggling with life and making mistakes. But he is seen as a mature person and sometimes deity who have to fulfil the parenting guidelines by society. Giving birth to a child comes with known responsibilities which one shouldn't take casually, as nurturing a child is something we can't redo.
After seeing quite a few Asian dramas, I saw all kinds of parents and the outcomes of their behaviour. So here I will be talking about different parent-child relationships by adding one Bollywood recommendation of similar relationship trope. ( CAUTION: the Bollywood movie may not resemble the drama in any aspects, but will show similar parenting concepts)
❤Yes I support you my dear ❤
Kang Mi Rae wants to go through plastic surgery. She doesn't know if it can change her life but changing her face is something she wants to do eagerly out of all the bitter memories she holds inside. Her father is against this surgery because he wants her not to change. He says if people knew for what she is rather than the face, which is also very adorable, there's no need for such things. Mi Rae despite all support from her family wants to live her life like every other girl, she wants to act cute in front of a shopkeeper to get a discount, she wants to dance enjoying the lyrics, and she wants to be loved. Her mother knows that getting plastic surgery isn't the solution of what she is suffering through but supports her in this decision without caring of what her husband will say, because foremost she cares for Mi Rae, she doesn't want her to live in sorrow or guilt. Later on, Mi Rae's father finds her smiling in confidence which is sufficient for him to hug her again.
Who decides what's wrong and right? People mocking others based on their own criteria is something prevalent. And we usually get influenced by those mindsets which, when thought about, practically don't matter. A Parent sometimes ignores the child's desire in order to avoid a few rude taunts from neighbours. But they should try to understand the mental condition of that child who's demanding that kind of thing. If it's not wrong according to law, then helping your child till the end is a part of making them emotionally strong.
BOLLYWOOD MOVIE: QUEEN (2013)
❤Let's work hard together for the dream ❤
Kim Bok Joo is a weightlifter pursuing her dream, and her father solely supports her with everything. He works hard despite being sick and smiles when Bok Joo lifts weights.
Kim Bok Joo, unlike every other young, naive girl, falls in love and feels the need to change her image to a soft girl who needs to be taken care of. So she is running away from what she really is and try to turn into someone who's far away from a weightlifter. When Bok Joo's father learns about it, he is very heartbroken and angry, and he doesn't want to see her again as he is disappointed after doing all the hard work for Bok Joo who easily gave up on her dream. But deep inside, he knows what Bok Joo feels since she's a girl but is trained to be tough. He keeps getting her girlish items and ask her to enjoy, like every other youngster. But what he understands is that for momentary attractions, dreams can't be abandoned. Sometimes he's strict and rude, but till the end he is by her side, smiling and encouraging through hard and happy times.
Sometimes we don't give our dreams enough importance just to achieve temporary happiness. To our parents, we seem foolish, but in reality, we are just naive. Parents force us towards working hard and that, at one moment, becomes a burden for us, but they understand better than anyone that we will regret some of the decisions we took emotionally. So to help us, they act strict or rude.
BOLLYWOOD MOVIE: DANGAL (2016)
Parents with this kind of mindset do not necessarily have bad intentions for their children since they only worry constantly about them. However, with this attitude, they mislead their child to escape the rightful paths and choose something that can be problematic in future. They should ask their own child to work hard or at least give them some values for not judging people based on class/money.
BOLLYWOOD MOVIE: Main Prem Ki Diwani Hoon (2003)
❤ I gave birth, I will decide your fate ❤
Kwon Soo Ah is a top student but feels continuously pressured by her mother to maintain a decent image. She has to be the number one position and has to follow higher class etiquette. Her mother promised her that she won't regret living like this and eventually will become a person who can't be touched by anyone. She makes friends who benefit her, and everything is decided by her mother, even her dreams. Seo Ha Joon is another top student in the same Institute, who is aggressive and only focusses on working hard. His mental state is somewhat unstable due to the trauma he is suffering from. His father wants him to go to a top university and can't tolerate any mistake. He uses high violence to discipline Ha Joon.
Oh Se Ho is a hardworking, smart student, always trying to satisfy his mother. But his mother never appreciates him and thinks of him as incompetent compared to her. Se Ho, therefore, suffers from certain emotional conditions that don't let him think morally right. Once, he visits Kang Bok Soo's home and finds his mother to be very kind. He says "I didn't know these types of mothers who are shown in dramas existed in reality too."
We try to make friends with similar mindsets or tastes. It becomes easier for us to hang out with people who love what we love. But in parenting, making your child follow a similar kind of thought as you do is not right, you and your child can have identical faces, but the way to interpret life can be different. Also, disciplining child using violence is morally wrong; it must have some limitations.
BOLLYWOOD MOVIES: 3 IDIOTS (2009) & Udaan (2010)
5. Emotionally unstable
❤Go away from my sight❤
Takano Kyohei is an extremely handsome man. He is always followed by girls at an abnormal rate. His mother always tries to save him from chaotic places. She tries hard but soon becomes exhausted of all the crazy things going around. She can't take it anymore, she thinks of Kyohei as a curse and tells him to go away. Our male lead is in deep sorrow and decides to live alone.
After some years, he revisits her. She breakdowns and ask for an apology. But this happiness doesn't last long since she again recalls past memories and can't accept him. He is problematic for her, and she can't bear him with his beauty which attracts tons of people.
Wang So is sent away from his mother, and he is treated like he never existed. His mother thinks of him as bad luck and hates to see his face. Wang So tries so hard to get his mother's attention. His heart, therefore, is full of hatred. He melts at the end when finally his mother touches his face.
Have you heard of instances where a child is ashamed of their parents? We blame the children for being so heartless toward someone who loved them and made many sacrifices. But what if it's an opposite case? Who to blame? The child hadn't done anything remarkable for their parents yet and is also burdening them. It's a complex situation in which we can't tell the exact outline of emotions. But when someone decides to have a child, he/she should never hate them for being incapable according to their desires or feel fed up because of some of their children's flaws.
BOLLYWOOD MOVIE: Taare Zameen Par (2007)
6. Bonus - True love
❤ Your smile melts my heart ❤
Ahn Do Hoon is entitled with so many sins and never realises them. He carelessly deals with relationship and faith of people. But, in the end, when he sees his son smiling away from him, he cries and regrets everything. He feels alone and wants to hug his child.
THE SUMMER OF MY LIFE MAKES IT HARD TO BREATHE,
IF I CAN FLY ABOVE THE SKY, I WANT YOU TO MEET
YOUR SMILE FOR A WHILE, FEELS SO GOOD,
I WANT TO STARE AT IT FOREVER, IF I COULD.
BOLLYWOOD MOVIE: Good Newwz (2019)